Right now, as we speak, I'm sitting in my office as usual. I have the distinct pleasure of working with some awesome ladies in my office, as well. Usually when working in the office we have lots of stuff to do, people to call, kids to interview, hearts to break, moms and dads to coddle, etc. So you can see, I'm a very busy/important person. And usually the demographic of the office is such that most everyone I work with is of the female persuasion, sans Keith and the El Jefe. This usually makes for a great work environment.
However!
There are certain days where planets align in just such a way, and events of the world coincide to make the office environment a little more...skewed. The events come together almost like a perfect storm and the events look like this.
1) Keith is out of the office and the Boss is in a meeting
2) No one wants to come in and interview
3) The ladies in the office have had very estrous weekends (trust me it makes sense)
At this point the sole male in the office finds himself lost in a storm of estrogen! The perfect storm of estrogen where he can find no paddle to get himself to shore. Now don't get me wrong I'm not saying I don't love the ladies that I work with; they really are great gals. But the onslaught of wedding/past haircut appointments/shoe/potential haircut appointments/in-law/cute outfit conversations, at times, do get a little overwhelming. So as we speak I'm sitting in my office-as a safehaven for the girly chatter going out outside my office. Since I'm, for the present moment, sheltered from the waves of estrogen that beat at my office door I'm going to write you dudes out there some helpful tips on how you can still assert your dudeness in the midst of a torrent of chick-ness:
1) Go to your office and write a blog
2) Depending on the conversation which is going on, make some 'typical male statement' to let the ladies know that yes, you are a dude and no, you are not going to be sucked into their conversation! Take an example:
Girl: Man and then they played 'Foolish Games' by Jewel at the wedding while the bride was processing and it was so touching that even the little ring-boy started crying. It was precious!
Guy: Psshh...you know that kid is in for a life of ridicule and hardship.
Girl: Ohhhh stop it. It was precious!
Guy: Yeah and so is getting pummeled in junior high for being a baby.
See it's really easy, and actually doesn't involve too much thought. Just do it.
3) If you are drinking coffee while said conversation is ongoing, stare very intently into your coffee cup. If you don't want to be as brash as to openly ridicule the ladies' stories, this will make you look like you are paying attention. Well...sort of paying attention. And plus water is the most maleable of all the 4 elements. Maybe you could try to move it with your mind? Just try it.
4) Patronize and leave. This is a great tactic because not only does it convey feigned interest in the conversation, it also lets you leave fairly gracefully and without upsetting anybody. Let's see how it works!
Girl: ...and I was so bummed because they were my favorite pair of shoes! I was walking and then the heel just snapped off in the sewer grate! Arrgghh!
Guy: Yeah, I have just ruined my favorite pair of shoes too. It's such a drag to get them re-soled, you know!
Girl: I totally do know! What a pain...
Guy: And you know what, I'm don't really know where to get them resoled. While I'm thinking about it, I actually should probably go look up some place right now. I'll let you know what I find.
Unless you are a good liar, though, this conversation will probably only work if you have some kind of story that's related to what the lady is talking about. If she starts talking about breaking her shoe, and you clearly don't have ruined shoes, you're going to look like a douche trying to stumble and mumble through a fake story that, for all intents and purposes, is stupid.
So those are some helpful hints, kids. And you ladies out there, be sensitive when you outnumber your male coworkers or friends in conversation. And if you, ladies, are good enough friends with said dudes, maybe you can give them some more helpful hints about how to avoid a potential drowning in the sea of estrogen. That's all for now!
Tuesday, May 31, 2005
Tuesday, May 24, 2005
Praise the Lord!!!
IT HAPPENED! HALLELUJAH!!
As you all know by now, Arrested Development is coming back for a 3rd season on Fox!! Praise the Lord!! As a tribute to my happiness (and your future happiness if you are fortunate enough to watch the show) I'm going to sing the Doxology, but tweak the words a little bit!
ahem
'Praise God from whom all blessings flooooowwwww!
Praise Him all creatures here me loooooooo!
Praise Him above ya heavenly hooooooooooosts!
Praise Father, Son, and Holy Ghost that Arrested Development is back on Foooooooooox!
Aaaaaaaaameeeeeeeeeeeeeeen!!'
I don't think that's sacreligious if it's a true expression of my heart...which is clearly is! I can't wait for next season!
As you all know by now, Arrested Development is coming back for a 3rd season on Fox!! Praise the Lord!! As a tribute to my happiness (and your future happiness if you are fortunate enough to watch the show) I'm going to sing the Doxology, but tweak the words a little bit!
ahem
'Praise God from whom all blessings flooooowwwww!
Praise Him all creatures here me loooooooo!
Praise Him above ya heavenly hooooooooooosts!
Praise Father, Son, and Holy Ghost that Arrested Development is back on Foooooooooox!
Aaaaaaaaameeeeeeeeeeeeeeen!!'
I don't think that's sacreligious if it's a true expression of my heart...which is clearly is! I can't wait for next season!
thought pad
thought pad. This is what Hampton Inn calls their post it notes. It's my own personal thought pad. How cute is that? I'm not sure if I think it's clever, stupid, or new agey. I do know that I'm expending far too much thought on the subject though and it's probably things like these that drive men to their graves early.
So what would go on my thought pad today if I were to fill it out? Good question I'm so glad you asked. Time to blog stuff to it bullet point style.
1.) First and foremost I just found out that Coldplay is coming to Pittsburgh August 11th. I'm just about as excited as ou can be to see an up and coming band in concert. Totally will be a sweet show since they're a new band with a ton of good stuff. They don't have a whole lot to choose from to play, so you know you're going to get the good stuff. Make fun of "Yellow" if you want; I dare say it's a killer song.
2.) In the tradition of mentioning good deeds and news - Albert Pujols is involved in extensive work and mentoring of kids with Downs Syndrome. He spends time weekly with them. He went to a fund raiser for Downs and bid on and won a trip for four to Disney World, which he gave to this girl's family who he mentors. That my friends is a good deed and deserves mentioning in our blog.
3.) Also deserving of mention would be the snack, in any variety, Cheetos. Cheetos are so good and addicting. Whether it's straight puffs, crunchies, color changers, springs, or x's and o's - Cheetos are killer wicked good. One might say they're underrated.
4.) Not killer wicked good is the current compromise in the senate over filibusters. I'm glad that for years Republicans preached reform. Not falling to status quo and trying to please both sides like the Democrats. Now the Republicans get elected into power preaching reform and different and what do they do, succumb to the Democrats crying that Republicans are unfair. Unfair they want judges to get a vote, LIKE ALL OTHER JUDGES IN THE PAST HAVE, because Democrats don't have the votes to stop them. I'm sorry that we were going to appoint judges that THE MAJORITY OF AMERICA SUPPORTS WITH THEIR VOTES. VOTES SUPPORTING AMERICAN VALUES AND REPUBLICAN BELIEFS. In no way is it my fault the Democrats our out of touch with this country, so why should my party have to cater to the losers. It's pathetic. I'm really disappointed in the Republicans at this point.
5.) Extremely disappoined with John McCain. A man who is a loved and a quote machine. Whatever this guy says is turned to gold practically. But instead of blazing the trail he is the one who bends and caters and wimps out. American people have spoken and McCain has disobeyed. McCain will not have my vote should he be running in 2008. Maybe because he has no spine.
6.) Good conservative and thought provoking reading for the summer Just some good books for all you to read out there over the summer. Never let your brain get lazy it's a tough thing to get back.
7.) Where should I go to law school? Readers poll.
8.) My blogs have been long of late so I'm going to cut it short here guys. Catch all y'inz later.
So what would go on my thought pad today if I were to fill it out? Good question I'm so glad you asked. Time to blog stuff to it bullet point style.
1.) First and foremost I just found out that Coldplay is coming to Pittsburgh August 11th. I'm just about as excited as ou can be to see an up and coming band in concert. Totally will be a sweet show since they're a new band with a ton of good stuff. They don't have a whole lot to choose from to play, so you know you're going to get the good stuff. Make fun of "Yellow" if you want; I dare say it's a killer song.
2.) In the tradition of mentioning good deeds and news - Albert Pujols is involved in extensive work and mentoring of kids with Downs Syndrome. He spends time weekly with them. He went to a fund raiser for Downs and bid on and won a trip for four to Disney World, which he gave to this girl's family who he mentors. That my friends is a good deed and deserves mentioning in our blog.
3.) Also deserving of mention would be the snack, in any variety, Cheetos. Cheetos are so good and addicting. Whether it's straight puffs, crunchies, color changers, springs, or x's and o's - Cheetos are killer wicked good. One might say they're underrated.
4.) Not killer wicked good is the current compromise in the senate over filibusters. I'm glad that for years Republicans preached reform. Not falling to status quo and trying to please both sides like the Democrats. Now the Republicans get elected into power preaching reform and different and what do they do, succumb to the Democrats crying that Republicans are unfair. Unfair they want judges to get a vote, LIKE ALL OTHER JUDGES IN THE PAST HAVE, because Democrats don't have the votes to stop them. I'm sorry that we were going to appoint judges that THE MAJORITY OF AMERICA SUPPORTS WITH THEIR VOTES. VOTES SUPPORTING AMERICAN VALUES AND REPUBLICAN BELIEFS. In no way is it my fault the Democrats our out of touch with this country, so why should my party have to cater to the losers. It's pathetic. I'm really disappointed in the Republicans at this point.
5.) Extremely disappoined with John McCain. A man who is a loved and a quote machine. Whatever this guy says is turned to gold practically. But instead of blazing the trail he is the one who bends and caters and wimps out. American people have spoken and McCain has disobeyed. McCain will not have my vote should he be running in 2008. Maybe because he has no spine.
6.) Good conservative and thought provoking reading for the summer Just some good books for all you to read out there over the summer. Never let your brain get lazy it's a tough thing to get back.
7.) Where should I go to law school? Readers poll.
8.) My blogs have been long of late so I'm going to cut it short here guys. Catch all y'inz later.
Monday, May 23, 2005
BUFFALO
Out of these 3 New Yorkian cities, one of the cities is substantially better than the other two put together. The 3 cities are, in order of appearance on I-90 driving East to West, are:
1 Buffalo
2 Rochester
3 Syracuse
(Jeopardy music)
And the winner is Buffalo, NY! I know, I know, if you have talked to me abour travel I've likely told you how much I hate driving around Buffalo because of the traffic (the main culprit for causing horrible traffic? You guessed it...semi trucks). But on the whole, Buffalo has some nice little attributes that you won't find in Syracuse and Rochester, like:
1. Bums that aren't as hostile
2. A Metro-Train that runs through the city
3. City Hall is really big!
4. Cool looking smoke stacks that effuse only the whitest, pure smoke!
5. Old buildings
6. More downtown convenience stores that sell beer! They sell beer in convenience stores here!
those are some interesting things about Buffalo. Go stuff to it.
1 Buffalo
2 Rochester
3 Syracuse
(Jeopardy music)
And the winner is Buffalo, NY! I know, I know, if you have talked to me abour travel I've likely told you how much I hate driving around Buffalo because of the traffic (the main culprit for causing horrible traffic? You guessed it...semi trucks). But on the whole, Buffalo has some nice little attributes that you won't find in Syracuse and Rochester, like:
1. Bums that aren't as hostile
2. A Metro-Train that runs through the city
3. City Hall is really big!
4. Cool looking smoke stacks that effuse only the whitest, pure smoke!
5. Old buildings
6. More downtown convenience stores that sell beer! They sell beer in convenience stores here!
those are some interesting things about Buffalo. Go stuff to it.
Thursday, May 19, 2005
Hey Mae!
Today, upon the recommendation of Diana, I went out and bought the newest album by Mae. Normally I'm not the type of guy to just go out and 1) buy an album let alone 2) buy an album of a band I've never listened to until today. Personally I am a fan of face-smashing, neck-wrecking heavy metal. Mae is not anything like this. But something came over me, and I decided that I would go out, on a whim, and check Mae out.
Let me tell you what, this album has completely crushed me, and I could not be happier.
I don't know if I've ever bought an album like this in my entire life. I started to listen to it in the car on the way home from Best Buy in Syracuse, and I didn't want to get out of the car. Ever. It's a whole hour of storytelling, picture book-esque, melodic heart-break-rock. The album comes with it's own illustrated book, and the opening track encourages the listener to take an hour out of their day to follow along with the CD by reading the lyrics that accompany the CD. It's truly revolutionary. I am not even going to go into more detail because I feel like if I tell you what happens, then I'll be ruining a wonderful story that you, the music fan, needs to explore. I think the only thing that I'm pissed about is that if I ever aspire to be a recording artist, I'm going to have to be a lot more creative now that I've got Mae, the spoiler, to set the standard. Go get Mae's new album, "The Everglow". Thanks Diana, for the recommendation.
Let me tell you what, this album has completely crushed me, and I could not be happier.
I don't know if I've ever bought an album like this in my entire life. I started to listen to it in the car on the way home from Best Buy in Syracuse, and I didn't want to get out of the car. Ever. It's a whole hour of storytelling, picture book-esque, melodic heart-break-rock. The album comes with it's own illustrated book, and the opening track encourages the listener to take an hour out of their day to follow along with the CD by reading the lyrics that accompany the CD. It's truly revolutionary. I am not even going to go into more detail because I feel like if I tell you what happens, then I'll be ruining a wonderful story that you, the music fan, needs to explore. I think the only thing that I'm pissed about is that if I ever aspire to be a recording artist, I'm going to have to be a lot more creative now that I've got Mae, the spoiler, to set the standard. Go get Mae's new album, "The Everglow". Thanks Diana, for the recommendation.
Tuesday, May 17, 2005
Completion of the Juggernaut
It always seems like the third part of a trilogy has two components in the name. It always has a completion or a fullness to it and some word with power like Jedi. Jedis are so tough. Anyway, so my title fulfills both those qualities. Without further ado the completion of my trip.
So we embarked on our journey home still on a U2 high if you will. No, not from drugs, but rather just really good music. I'm still not sure how much sleep I got or what time I woke up with the whole time change and all. It's kind of confusing to find out when to wake up to leave to lose an hour to get home at a certain time. Needless to say we ate our lovely Hampton Inn complimentary breakfast, which was slamming, and got back in the car again.
It was nice to get out of Illinois, although in order to do so I had to leave my check book at the last toll since they had drained me of every other resource of any value. I drove the speed limit the entire way across Illinois and Indiana ... yet somehow reached Toledo, OH in about two and a half hours. If you want good gas, good food, and fairly easy on and off access I highly recommend the exit off 80 for Toledo South Maumee. It's got a Wendy's, well priced gas, and restaurants if you're looking to make your trip even longer.
Jess and I played way too much of the alphabet game along the way. You know the game where you look for a word that starts with the letter "a" and then when you find it you look for one that starts with "b" and so on. Let me tell you "q, v, and z" can be a real bear. We got sick, or addicted it depends on who you ask, of the alphabet game so Jess invented a new game for us to play. We call it "4 in 1" The game has many variations so I'll let your mind go wild. The basic premise of the game is that you are in a room with 4 people for 1 hour (hence 4 in 1) and you can only talk to them one at a time for an hour. Say you were asking me the question you might say, "Keith you're in a room with the following people for one hour: Bono, Sean Hannity, President Bush, and Katie Holmes (pre-Tom Cruise and she's somehow intersted in me). Who do you talk to and for how long? the cop out is 15 minutes a piece, but you find it's rarely that way. For instance I would probably give 20 minutes to Katie Holmes (a brother can dream right), 10 minutes to Bono and 15 Sean Hannity and President Bush. I'm hoping they'd all understand and give me their number to hang out later.
So the person you're with comes up with them for you. And then you switch it on them. It can also be a bad scenario you're in a room with Ted Kennedy, John Kerry, the Grim Reaper, and you cousin Rusty ... who do you talk to. In that case I take Grim for about 59 minutes and 51 seconds. Leaving me three seconds a piece for the other three to say, "You stink I hate you." The game amused us for miles ... hours ... exits. However you want to refer to it. I suggest you try it.
We made it home and it was great to get out of the car. Great bonding, great music, great mileage, great tunes on the way there and back, and a fun new game to play. I had the next 40 minutes to reflect on it ... before I had to get into the car and drive to Pittsburgh for Mother's Day dinner.
But you know what? U2 was worth it.
So we embarked on our journey home still on a U2 high if you will. No, not from drugs, but rather just really good music. I'm still not sure how much sleep I got or what time I woke up with the whole time change and all. It's kind of confusing to find out when to wake up to leave to lose an hour to get home at a certain time. Needless to say we ate our lovely Hampton Inn complimentary breakfast, which was slamming, and got back in the car again.
It was nice to get out of Illinois, although in order to do so I had to leave my check book at the last toll since they had drained me of every other resource of any value. I drove the speed limit the entire way across Illinois and Indiana ... yet somehow reached Toledo, OH in about two and a half hours. If you want good gas, good food, and fairly easy on and off access I highly recommend the exit off 80 for Toledo South Maumee. It's got a Wendy's, well priced gas, and restaurants if you're looking to make your trip even longer.
Jess and I played way too much of the alphabet game along the way. You know the game where you look for a word that starts with the letter "a" and then when you find it you look for one that starts with "b" and so on. Let me tell you "q, v, and z" can be a real bear. We got sick, or addicted it depends on who you ask, of the alphabet game so Jess invented a new game for us to play. We call it "4 in 1" The game has many variations so I'll let your mind go wild. The basic premise of the game is that you are in a room with 4 people for 1 hour (hence 4 in 1) and you can only talk to them one at a time for an hour. Say you were asking me the question you might say, "Keith you're in a room with the following people for one hour: Bono, Sean Hannity, President Bush, and Katie Holmes (pre-Tom Cruise and she's somehow intersted in me). Who do you talk to and for how long? the cop out is 15 minutes a piece, but you find it's rarely that way. For instance I would probably give 20 minutes to Katie Holmes (a brother can dream right), 10 minutes to Bono and 15 Sean Hannity and President Bush. I'm hoping they'd all understand and give me their number to hang out later.
So the person you're with comes up with them for you. And then you switch it on them. It can also be a bad scenario you're in a room with Ted Kennedy, John Kerry, the Grim Reaper, and you cousin Rusty ... who do you talk to. In that case I take Grim for about 59 minutes and 51 seconds. Leaving me three seconds a piece for the other three to say, "You stink I hate you." The game amused us for miles ... hours ... exits. However you want to refer to it. I suggest you try it.
We made it home and it was great to get out of the car. Great bonding, great music, great mileage, great tunes on the way there and back, and a fun new game to play. I had the next 40 minutes to reflect on it ... before I had to get into the car and drive to Pittsburgh for Mother's Day dinner.
But you know what? U2 was worth it.
Monday, May 16, 2005
I'm on a (angry) roll!
Ok I could not pass up this opportunity to slam MTV. I hate MTV. I hate everyone who works for MTV. I hate myself when I love the Real World Inferno. So digest this garbage if you can. This is an excerpt from an article about the Audioslave concert in Havana, Cuba. I also hate whoever wrote this article:
"A note about the venue: It's a surprisingly modern-looking — at least by Cuba's normally shopworn standards — open-air plaza featuring tubular steel arches that create a tunnel effect, ending in a stage that can accommodate events musical or political. In fact, La Tribuna became famous several years ago as the place Cubans rallied for the return of Elian Gonzales, the boy that sadly became a political football in the decades-old chest-thumping contest between Cuba and its large and powerful neighbor to the north. So the plaza just happens to sit smack-dab in front of the only American government presence in Cuba, the heavily fortified U.S. Interests Section (Guantanamo Bay is not technically part of Cuba), and the billboards the Cubans have erected in front of it give new meaning to in-your-face defiance. "Señores Imperialistas, no los tenemos absolutamente ningún miedo!" (Mr. Imperialists, we have absolutely no fear of you!). Scenes of Abu Ghraib, captioned simply "Fascistas." And just behind the stage, "Venceremos!" (We will win!)."
I can't even type long coherent sentences I'm so pissed, so I'll just bullet point my tirade
How to get your Head out of your Arse 101:
1) "It's a surprisingly modern-looking — at least by Cuba's normally shopworn standards — open-air plaza featuring tubular steel arches that create a tunnel effect, ending in a stage that can accommodate events musical or political."
Who can we thank for this surprisingly modern looking, impressive stadium? The millions of impoverished, malnourised, maligned underlcass who slave all day to give their money to a defunct economic paradigm that turns their hard work into useless garbage. Thanks, people of Cuba, for dying hand over fist to make a venue for Audioslave to bash America; and thank you Castro for killing your people yet somehow appearing magnanimous for building such a stadium for your oppressed people.
2) "In fact, La Tribuna became famous several years ago as the place Cubans rallied for the return of Elian Gonzales, the boy that sadly became a political football in the decades-old chest-thumping contest between Cuba and its large and powerful neighbor to the north"
I lived in Miami for nearly 10 years. Daily I saw rafts of people coming to America for freedom. Weekly people risked life and limb to get away from a nation that only sucks life out of people to fuel a narrow minded megalomaniac's dream. If you talk to most Cubans in Miami they will tell you that rather than seeing America as a chest thumping imprialist nation, they see America as a compassionate counselor with arms extended to welcome the tired, hungry, the oppressed, and afflicted. After all, the rafts from Cuba are never turned away. Those are the rafts from Haiti, get it right
3) "...and the billboards the Cubans have erected in front of it give new meaning to in-your-face defiance. "Señores Imperialistas, no los tenemos absolutamente ningún miedo!" (Mr. Imperialists, we have absolutely no fear of you!). Scenes of Abu Ghraib, captioned simply "Fascistas." And just behind the stage, "Venceremos!" (We will win!)."
Wow wow wow. I'm glad some young reporter from MTV has bought into the political propaganda foisted on the Cuban people by Castro. Hey dude, the Cuban people didn't erect those signs of their own free will. If you think about it for half a second, you will realize that the Communist regime has to use propaganda. Signs of defiance are not erected by the Cuban people, but rather by the Cuban named Fidel Castro. Wow. And Castro is going to call us Facists? Do you know why Castro puts those signs up? Because he knows starry eyed liberal kids are going to come down to Cuba and hate on America. He knows only the ignorance of youth could ever possibly buy into the ideals of communism. He knows that only an uneducated, reactionary person would look at that and say "Hey, Cuba is calling America a group of facists. That makes so much sense!!" I hope whoever wrote this horrible article gets run over.
"And just behind the stage, 'Viceremos!' (We Will Win". Guys you've already lost over and over again. There is no one for you to win against. Think about it.
"A note about the venue: It's a surprisingly modern-looking — at least by Cuba's normally shopworn standards — open-air plaza featuring tubular steel arches that create a tunnel effect, ending in a stage that can accommodate events musical or political. In fact, La Tribuna became famous several years ago as the place Cubans rallied for the return of Elian Gonzales, the boy that sadly became a political football in the decades-old chest-thumping contest between Cuba and its large and powerful neighbor to the north. So the plaza just happens to sit smack-dab in front of the only American government presence in Cuba, the heavily fortified U.S. Interests Section (Guantanamo Bay is not technically part of Cuba), and the billboards the Cubans have erected in front of it give new meaning to in-your-face defiance. "Señores Imperialistas, no los tenemos absolutamente ningún miedo!" (Mr. Imperialists, we have absolutely no fear of you!). Scenes of Abu Ghraib, captioned simply "Fascistas." And just behind the stage, "Venceremos!" (We will win!)."
I can't even type long coherent sentences I'm so pissed, so I'll just bullet point my tirade
How to get your Head out of your Arse 101:
1) "It's a surprisingly modern-looking — at least by Cuba's normally shopworn standards — open-air plaza featuring tubular steel arches that create a tunnel effect, ending in a stage that can accommodate events musical or political."
Who can we thank for this surprisingly modern looking, impressive stadium? The millions of impoverished, malnourised, maligned underlcass who slave all day to give their money to a defunct economic paradigm that turns their hard work into useless garbage. Thanks, people of Cuba, for dying hand over fist to make a venue for Audioslave to bash America; and thank you Castro for killing your people yet somehow appearing magnanimous for building such a stadium for your oppressed people.
2) "In fact, La Tribuna became famous several years ago as the place Cubans rallied for the return of Elian Gonzales, the boy that sadly became a political football in the decades-old chest-thumping contest between Cuba and its large and powerful neighbor to the north"
I lived in Miami for nearly 10 years. Daily I saw rafts of people coming to America for freedom. Weekly people risked life and limb to get away from a nation that only sucks life out of people to fuel a narrow minded megalomaniac's dream. If you talk to most Cubans in Miami they will tell you that rather than seeing America as a chest thumping imprialist nation, they see America as a compassionate counselor with arms extended to welcome the tired, hungry, the oppressed, and afflicted. After all, the rafts from Cuba are never turned away. Those are the rafts from Haiti, get it right
3) "...and the billboards the Cubans have erected in front of it give new meaning to in-your-face defiance. "Señores Imperialistas, no los tenemos absolutamente ningún miedo!" (Mr. Imperialists, we have absolutely no fear of you!). Scenes of Abu Ghraib, captioned simply "Fascistas." And just behind the stage, "Venceremos!" (We will win!)."
Wow wow wow. I'm glad some young reporter from MTV has bought into the political propaganda foisted on the Cuban people by Castro. Hey dude, the Cuban people didn't erect those signs of their own free will. If you think about it for half a second, you will realize that the Communist regime has to use propaganda. Signs of defiance are not erected by the Cuban people, but rather by the Cuban named Fidel Castro. Wow. And Castro is going to call us Facists? Do you know why Castro puts those signs up? Because he knows starry eyed liberal kids are going to come down to Cuba and hate on America. He knows only the ignorance of youth could ever possibly buy into the ideals of communism. He knows that only an uneducated, reactionary person would look at that and say "Hey, Cuba is calling America a group of facists. That makes so much sense!!" I hope whoever wrote this horrible article gets run over.
"And just behind the stage, 'Viceremos!' (We Will Win". Guys you've already lost over and over again. There is no one for you to win against. Think about it.
Ninjas Attack
This blog has absolutely nothing to do with actual ninjas or pretend ones for that matter. But we all know the most important part of a sequel is its name. For example Star Wars hit the jackpot. It's sequel was known as Empire Strikes Back. That's so tough. Matrix Reloaded ... not as good a name. A sequel can be doomed by its name alone, or be well on its way to prosperity. The point of this post though is not a history of movie sequels it's to carry you through my journey to Chicago to see U2. The sequel includes a stunning revelation and the concert itself.
Jess and I arrived in Chicago as previously stated around 4:00 P.M. The concert is at 7:30 and we need to figure out our mode of travel as well as a dinner plan. After studying the Metra Rail we realize it's not going to work. It leaves us like 2 miles from where we want to be, and we're not rolling the dice and walking it. 2 miles of unknown roads in Chicago ... you can see why we're not too excited. So this leaves only one mode of transportation, back in the car for more driving fun and somehow finding a way to pay the exorbitant amount of tolls. Knowing it's Chicago and there is traffic we decide to leave at 5:30. We arrive at 6:30, after hitting tons of traffic and losing what seems like $25 to the state of Illinois and the upkeep of these horrible roads, and find rock star parking.
This is a phrase I haven't used on the blog yet, and one I use often. I think you can understand it. It's the type of parking you'd get if you were a rock star. In all reality rock stars are probably flown into the stadium so they don't have to walk at all. What a life. But our parking enables us to literally turn right from my parking spot, right onto the road, and then 30 feet ahead a right onto the freeway. It's as good as you can get. The Chicago gods are smiling on us. We then go stand in the freezing wind, windy city anyone, until the doors open. It's suddenly 7:03 when I wonder when the doors for this sucker are opening up. The concert starts in 27 minutes, and it hardly seems like an internationally famous band like U2 needs to have a line of people outside to drum up excitement. My sister doesn't know, and I wip out my cellphone to double check the time. That's when it happens ...
We realized there's an hour time change. We drove into Central time and it's only 6:00. Suddenly it makes a ton of sense, all the clues we missed. We listened to satellite radio on the way there and so they don't give the time. There was no stewardess to tell us the local time which I'm accustomed too. The clock at the Hampton Inn that we thought was wrong, nope, it was our watches that were wrong. The rock star parking, it was there because we were 2 hours early! We instantly feel like idiots. So despite the fact that between us our IQ is roughly 300 or 310 or something we didn't remember to change the clock. No matter though as they open the doors shortly at some random time like 6:14 CENTRAL TIME. So this enables us to catch a quick bite to eat and some of the Celtics Game 7 debacle. I'd rather not talk about it.
Just a couple of thoughts from one of the most amazing shows I've ever seen. The opening band was horrible. Kings of Leon opened for them and they had this Southern rock kind of sound. The drummer was pretty skilled and I think the bassist was as well. Unfortunately the guitarist and the lead singer left some to be desired. Every song ended on the same mash of chords and the singer saying something like, "Yeeaaaahhhhhhh!" Dreadful. How does a killer band like U2 not get someone AWESOME to open for them. Is it the fact that they're so good that no one will. Some band doesn't want to be an opener and take a small cut of the profit? I think that's what it must be.
U2 played for like two and a half hours. It was so sweet, and much longer than their last tour. The show contained that magical mix of energy, passion, and straight up talented music. They managed to play seven songs off their new album as well as some of the good old stuff as well. They played two of my top five favorite songs of theirs, yet somehow managed to play my least favorite song as well. All told about twenty-eight songs I think. Including several blatantly Christian references, choruses of Hallelujah, awesome fiber optic lighting, two encores, and a rendition of Psalm 40. The band referenced their passion for Africa several times and at one point had everyone hold up their cell phones with arena lights down to demonstrate the power when everyone bands togehter under one cause. All in all quite moving, and I found out they were recording the concert DVD at that show. So if you want to feel the same power, emotion, and all around awesomeness (yes I just made up a word if John Madden can do it for Monday Night Football I sure can for my blog) check out the concert DVD when it comes out. You can bet for sure I'll blog about it.
That's it for this sequel. Look for the conclusion to this awesome trilogy Wednesday. It will enlighten you with two awesome car games, well priced gas, Toledo, OH and a way to pass a good couple of hours that you may never have thought about before. Oh yeah, don't stop here with the blog. Make sure you read Andrew's below as well. We just both happened to blog on the same day. Silly us.
Jess and I arrived in Chicago as previously stated around 4:00 P.M. The concert is at 7:30 and we need to figure out our mode of travel as well as a dinner plan. After studying the Metra Rail we realize it's not going to work. It leaves us like 2 miles from where we want to be, and we're not rolling the dice and walking it. 2 miles of unknown roads in Chicago ... you can see why we're not too excited. So this leaves only one mode of transportation, back in the car for more driving fun and somehow finding a way to pay the exorbitant amount of tolls. Knowing it's Chicago and there is traffic we decide to leave at 5:30. We arrive at 6:30, after hitting tons of traffic and losing what seems like $25 to the state of Illinois and the upkeep of these horrible roads, and find rock star parking.
This is a phrase I haven't used on the blog yet, and one I use often. I think you can understand it. It's the type of parking you'd get if you were a rock star. In all reality rock stars are probably flown into the stadium so they don't have to walk at all. What a life. But our parking enables us to literally turn right from my parking spot, right onto the road, and then 30 feet ahead a right onto the freeway. It's as good as you can get. The Chicago gods are smiling on us. We then go stand in the freezing wind, windy city anyone, until the doors open. It's suddenly 7:03 when I wonder when the doors for this sucker are opening up. The concert starts in 27 minutes, and it hardly seems like an internationally famous band like U2 needs to have a line of people outside to drum up excitement. My sister doesn't know, and I wip out my cellphone to double check the time. That's when it happens ...
We realized there's an hour time change. We drove into Central time and it's only 6:00. Suddenly it makes a ton of sense, all the clues we missed. We listened to satellite radio on the way there and so they don't give the time. There was no stewardess to tell us the local time which I'm accustomed too. The clock at the Hampton Inn that we thought was wrong, nope, it was our watches that were wrong. The rock star parking, it was there because we were 2 hours early! We instantly feel like idiots. So despite the fact that between us our IQ is roughly 300 or 310 or something we didn't remember to change the clock. No matter though as they open the doors shortly at some random time like 6:14 CENTRAL TIME. So this enables us to catch a quick bite to eat and some of the Celtics Game 7 debacle. I'd rather not talk about it.
Just a couple of thoughts from one of the most amazing shows I've ever seen. The opening band was horrible. Kings of Leon opened for them and they had this Southern rock kind of sound. The drummer was pretty skilled and I think the bassist was as well. Unfortunately the guitarist and the lead singer left some to be desired. Every song ended on the same mash of chords and the singer saying something like, "Yeeaaaahhhhhhh!" Dreadful. How does a killer band like U2 not get someone AWESOME to open for them. Is it the fact that they're so good that no one will. Some band doesn't want to be an opener and take a small cut of the profit? I think that's what it must be.
U2 played for like two and a half hours. It was so sweet, and much longer than their last tour. The show contained that magical mix of energy, passion, and straight up talented music. They managed to play seven songs off their new album as well as some of the good old stuff as well. They played two of my top five favorite songs of theirs, yet somehow managed to play my least favorite song as well. All told about twenty-eight songs I think. Including several blatantly Christian references, choruses of Hallelujah, awesome fiber optic lighting, two encores, and a rendition of Psalm 40. The band referenced their passion for Africa several times and at one point had everyone hold up their cell phones with arena lights down to demonstrate the power when everyone bands togehter under one cause. All in all quite moving, and I found out they were recording the concert DVD at that show. So if you want to feel the same power, emotion, and all around awesomeness (yes I just made up a word if John Madden can do it for Monday Night Football I sure can for my blog) check out the concert DVD when it comes out. You can bet for sure I'll blog about it.
That's it for this sequel. Look for the conclusion to this awesome trilogy Wednesday. It will enlighten you with two awesome car games, well priced gas, Toledo, OH and a way to pass a good couple of hours that you may never have thought about before. Oh yeah, don't stop here with the blog. Make sure you read Andrew's below as well. We just both happened to blog on the same day. Silly us.
this is ridiculous
If you want to read that article you can. Here it is:
http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,156612,00.html
Yeah yeah yeah it's foxnews, but it's not the story itself that I was getting all up in arms about. If you read the article, it's about the Newsweek article that apparently reported that Americans at Gitmo were flushing the Quran down toilets in order to 'torture' prisoners at the camp.
In essence, Newsweek was reporting on Americans torturing the inmates of Gitmo by flushing their holy book down the toilet. First of all, a big red flag goes up because oh lo and behold there are no credible sources to confirm that this has actually transpired. Newsweek reporters hear rumors that this is going on, ask a few people in the Pentagon, none of whom give credible testimony that it has actually happened. Armed with loads of misleading and potentially erroneous info, the writeres Isikoff and Barry do what any seasoned journalist would do-slap it down in a nationally distributed magazine as gospel truth. That's responsible.
That's the first red flag. The shockwave effect that this has in the international Muslim community is devastating. Riots erupt in Pakistan and Afghanistan, people get ultra pissed at American ignorant pigs, and a few of the rioters even get trampled to death in the melee. Way to go Isikoff.
That's all bad news. Newsweek was irresponsible, some people overreacted and were killed, and now a formal investigation/apology has to be issued. What absolutely floors me though is that this whole sordid ordeal is sparked by what? Some American flushing a Muslim religious book down the toilet?? Give me a break people.
I can't believe that we live in a world where people think that they are owed an apology for everything!! From the article:
"After Newsweek published the story, demonstrations spread across Afghanistan and Muslims around the world decried the alleged desecration.
In Afghanistan, Islamic scholars and tribal elders called for the punishment of anyone found to have abused the Quran, said Maulawi Abdul Wali Arshad, head of the religious affairs department in Badakhshan province.
Arshad and the provincial police chief said the scholars met in Faizabad, 310 miles northeast of the capital, Kabul, and demanded a "reaction" from U.S. authorities within three days."
(On a sidenote, Muslim extremists can legitimately make these demands. Why? Because if you don't comply they will likely send someone over to kill some Americans somewhere. And it's funny how it works like that)
Give me a break people!! Let's survey the scene here:
1) America has captured people in Gitmo beacuse of suspected terrorist allegations. Terrorist, i.e. hate America and all it stands for, and subswequently have acted out of such hatred to cause harm to our countrymen/women. That's right, our citizens.
2) These suspected terrorists are virtually prisoners of war
3) There is no international law protecting said inmates religious objects. If we were talking about food, clothing, and shelter, yes they need those. I don't think such rights of protection apply to collections of paper.
The Quran is a Muslim holy book. Big freaking deal. I love how people in the international community will jump on anything to demand an apology. Forget the fact that 15 people were killed in riots by a false story that Newsweek published. The international community is more upset that someone flushed a book down the toilet. What is even better is that Christians are snuffed out all over the globe and no one hears a peep about it. And if a Christian leader were to demand reparations for the deaths of their brother and sister Christians, they would be spurned by said governments who oversee the killings. How do we know? Because it happens every day. Look at the Sudan. Look at the Congo. Look in South America. All over the world we have Chrisitans dying for their faith, and they count it as the cost for serving Christ. The islamo-facists get their Quran flushed and want the US to fall at their feet. While people of other religions die wholesale and narry a word is piped about it, the people perpetrating international terror, murder, graft, genocide, and hatred want an apology from us because someone got their Quran wet.
Why is it chic to question Christianity and the validity of the Bible, to suspend Crucifixes in urine, suppress the teaching of abstinence in schools, to protest the National Day of Prayer and Pro-Life rallies, oppose the appointment of Christmas and Easter as national holidays? And why would it be chic for the international Muslim community to demand, and probably get, a worldwide apology for the dampening of the Quran? This is ridiculous.
http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,156612,00.html
Yeah yeah yeah it's foxnews, but it's not the story itself that I was getting all up in arms about. If you read the article, it's about the Newsweek article that apparently reported that Americans at Gitmo were flushing the Quran down toilets in order to 'torture' prisoners at the camp.
In essence, Newsweek was reporting on Americans torturing the inmates of Gitmo by flushing their holy book down the toilet. First of all, a big red flag goes up because oh lo and behold there are no credible sources to confirm that this has actually transpired. Newsweek reporters hear rumors that this is going on, ask a few people in the Pentagon, none of whom give credible testimony that it has actually happened. Armed with loads of misleading and potentially erroneous info, the writeres Isikoff and Barry do what any seasoned journalist would do-slap it down in a nationally distributed magazine as gospel truth. That's responsible.
That's the first red flag. The shockwave effect that this has in the international Muslim community is devastating. Riots erupt in Pakistan and Afghanistan, people get ultra pissed at American ignorant pigs, and a few of the rioters even get trampled to death in the melee. Way to go Isikoff.
That's all bad news. Newsweek was irresponsible, some people overreacted and were killed, and now a formal investigation/apology has to be issued. What absolutely floors me though is that this whole sordid ordeal is sparked by what? Some American flushing a Muslim religious book down the toilet?? Give me a break people.
I can't believe that we live in a world where people think that they are owed an apology for everything!! From the article:
"After Newsweek published the story, demonstrations spread across Afghanistan and Muslims around the world decried the alleged desecration.
In Afghanistan, Islamic scholars and tribal elders called for the punishment of anyone found to have abused the Quran, said Maulawi Abdul Wali Arshad, head of the religious affairs department in Badakhshan province.
Arshad and the provincial police chief said the scholars met in Faizabad, 310 miles northeast of the capital, Kabul, and demanded a "reaction" from U.S. authorities within three days."
(On a sidenote, Muslim extremists can legitimately make these demands. Why? Because if you don't comply they will likely send someone over to kill some Americans somewhere. And it's funny how it works like that)
Give me a break people!! Let's survey the scene here:
1) America has captured people in Gitmo beacuse of suspected terrorist allegations. Terrorist, i.e. hate America and all it stands for, and subswequently have acted out of such hatred to cause harm to our countrymen/women. That's right, our citizens.
2) These suspected terrorists are virtually prisoners of war
3) There is no international law protecting said inmates religious objects. If we were talking about food, clothing, and shelter, yes they need those. I don't think such rights of protection apply to collections of paper.
The Quran is a Muslim holy book. Big freaking deal. I love how people in the international community will jump on anything to demand an apology. Forget the fact that 15 people were killed in riots by a false story that Newsweek published. The international community is more upset that someone flushed a book down the toilet. What is even better is that Christians are snuffed out all over the globe and no one hears a peep about it. And if a Christian leader were to demand reparations for the deaths of their brother and sister Christians, they would be spurned by said governments who oversee the killings. How do we know? Because it happens every day. Look at the Sudan. Look at the Congo. Look in South America. All over the world we have Chrisitans dying for their faith, and they count it as the cost for serving Christ. The islamo-facists get their Quran flushed and want the US to fall at their feet. While people of other religions die wholesale and narry a word is piped about it, the people perpetrating international terror, murder, graft, genocide, and hatred want an apology from us because someone got their Quran wet.
Why is it chic to question Christianity and the validity of the Bible, to suspend Crucifixes in urine, suppress the teaching of abstinence in schools, to protest the National Day of Prayer and Pro-Life rallies, oppose the appointment of Christmas and Easter as national holidays? And why would it be chic for the international Muslim community to demand, and probably get, a worldwide apology for the dampening of the Quran? This is ridiculous.
Thursday, May 12, 2005
Trilogies Rule
Think about it. Don't trilogies just rule? Things that come in three are always good. Either they're so good that they deserve to have three, or they're so bad that one of them is laughably good. Lord of the Rings - killer trilogy. Star Wars - so money. Back to the Future - two good movies and a third one that's downright high on the unintentional comedy scale. With that in mind, I'm going to begin a trilogy of blogs referring to the U2 concert that I attended last weekend. Consider today the opening act.
Last Saturday morning I left at 9:00 A.M. for Chicago. The concert was Saturday evening and I was supposed to leave Friday at lunch, spend the night there, explore the city Saturday, concert it up Saturday night, and then leave Sunday morning. It stretches out the trip and is a ton of fun. But unfortunately some stuff came up and we had to leave Saturday. Yes you're reading this right we were going to drive for roughly 14 hours in the span of 30. It's totally worth it though since U2 is sweet.
So we leave at 9:00. As the admissions counselor and seasoned traveler I am I had this trip planned out. Map Quest was throwing me the 7 hour line and I knew we'd have to stop once on the way for gas, food, and restroom necessities. My best guess was 6 and a half hours. So Jess and I head West. Mistake number one, passing the plaza that had a Manchu Wok. Anytime you can get some Chinese on the road it's a good day. We figured the next stop would do though. Unfortunately this offered a Burger King, Sbarros (this business seems to live solely off rest stops), and a Jody Maroni's Sausage World. Bad move #2 on our part, forgetting that this stop was at 11:35 - peak lunch hour.
The place was swarming with unparented children, lots of elderly, and generally anyone trying to get a meal. The line for Burger King was long and the line for people waiting for their food was even longer. It kind of makes you wonder what type of person is making your food at a Burger King rest stop ... So we get back in the car deciding neither of these are acceptable. Drive on to Indiana at which point we still have to stop for food. Bad move number 2 an extra stop due to poor planning. God smiled upon us though as this rest stop had three things that make a rest stop: McDonalds, Dairy Queen, and a hot girls. (Note: These girls were on the scale of Indian hotness, not national hotness. You take what you can get when a rest stop appears in the middle of a field with some irrigation and burnt out crops.)
After nourishment and stretching it was back in the car to finish the trip through Indiana. Two points of note here - One Indiana has nothing really other than South Bend up north. No wonder everyone goes nuts over Notre Dame football it's all they have. Two Gary, Indiana is horrible, despite what the Music Man leads you to believe. It has bad roads, more bad roads, bumps in the road making it worse, and it's ultra crowded. Bad area. Onto Illinois where I swear I had to leave my soul in order to compensate for all the tolls I had to pay. I feel like every 4 miles I had to pay 85 cents. Do they think I'm stupid and think, "Oh wow at least I'm only paying 85 cents it won't add up to a lot or anything. I definitely feel jipped.
Finally arrived to the Hampton Inn at 4:00 P.M. It took me 7 hours all told. I blame the second stop, it absolutely killed us. I also blame tons of kids, incompetent Burger King workers, parents, and too many tolls. My sister and I made a pact on the trip not to eat at Burger King the rest of the time, largely due to their horrible commercials with the King costume with the gigantic head. What's up with commercials lately using mascots with big heads? The Quaker Oats commercial the other day had a huge plastic Quaker head on! Do the suits in the board room not realize this scares us? Cause it sure doesn't make me want to buy their food.
Lessons learned on the trip:
1.) Start earlier that 9:00
2.) Don't stop at peak lunch hour.
3.) Don't let your kids run around unattended.
4.) Don't let rest stop 173 pass you by on I-80 in Ohio. The rest of it is downhill.
5.) Indiana sucks something fierce.
6.) Gary, Indiana is overrated.
7.) If you live in Chicago have a lot of kids and just trade them in instead of tolls. It has to be a money saver.
Part two of the trilogy tomorrow perhaps. Stay tuned ...
Last Saturday morning I left at 9:00 A.M. for Chicago. The concert was Saturday evening and I was supposed to leave Friday at lunch, spend the night there, explore the city Saturday, concert it up Saturday night, and then leave Sunday morning. It stretches out the trip and is a ton of fun. But unfortunately some stuff came up and we had to leave Saturday. Yes you're reading this right we were going to drive for roughly 14 hours in the span of 30. It's totally worth it though since U2 is sweet.
So we leave at 9:00. As the admissions counselor and seasoned traveler I am I had this trip planned out. Map Quest was throwing me the 7 hour line and I knew we'd have to stop once on the way for gas, food, and restroom necessities. My best guess was 6 and a half hours. So Jess and I head West. Mistake number one, passing the plaza that had a Manchu Wok. Anytime you can get some Chinese on the road it's a good day. We figured the next stop would do though. Unfortunately this offered a Burger King, Sbarros (this business seems to live solely off rest stops), and a Jody Maroni's Sausage World. Bad move #2 on our part, forgetting that this stop was at 11:35 - peak lunch hour.
The place was swarming with unparented children, lots of elderly, and generally anyone trying to get a meal. The line for Burger King was long and the line for people waiting for their food was even longer. It kind of makes you wonder what type of person is making your food at a Burger King rest stop ... So we get back in the car deciding neither of these are acceptable. Drive on to Indiana at which point we still have to stop for food. Bad move number 2 an extra stop due to poor planning. God smiled upon us though as this rest stop had three things that make a rest stop: McDonalds, Dairy Queen, and a hot girls. (Note: These girls were on the scale of Indian hotness, not national hotness. You take what you can get when a rest stop appears in the middle of a field with some irrigation and burnt out crops.)
After nourishment and stretching it was back in the car to finish the trip through Indiana. Two points of note here - One Indiana has nothing really other than South Bend up north. No wonder everyone goes nuts over Notre Dame football it's all they have. Two Gary, Indiana is horrible, despite what the Music Man leads you to believe. It has bad roads, more bad roads, bumps in the road making it worse, and it's ultra crowded. Bad area. Onto Illinois where I swear I had to leave my soul in order to compensate for all the tolls I had to pay. I feel like every 4 miles I had to pay 85 cents. Do they think I'm stupid and think, "Oh wow at least I'm only paying 85 cents it won't add up to a lot or anything. I definitely feel jipped.
Finally arrived to the Hampton Inn at 4:00 P.M. It took me 7 hours all told. I blame the second stop, it absolutely killed us. I also blame tons of kids, incompetent Burger King workers, parents, and too many tolls. My sister and I made a pact on the trip not to eat at Burger King the rest of the time, largely due to their horrible commercials with the King costume with the gigantic head. What's up with commercials lately using mascots with big heads? The Quaker Oats commercial the other day had a huge plastic Quaker head on! Do the suits in the board room not realize this scares us? Cause it sure doesn't make me want to buy their food.
Lessons learned on the trip:
1.) Start earlier that 9:00
2.) Don't stop at peak lunch hour.
3.) Don't let your kids run around unattended.
4.) Don't let rest stop 173 pass you by on I-80 in Ohio. The rest of it is downhill.
5.) Indiana sucks something fierce.
6.) Gary, Indiana is overrated.
7.) If you live in Chicago have a lot of kids and just trade them in instead of tolls. It has to be a money saver.
Part two of the trilogy tomorrow perhaps. Stay tuned ...
Wednesday, May 11, 2005
His laser says your oven works fine
This is an actual quote I heard from our land lady last night. Let me fill you in on the details. I return home last night around 10:00 from a college fair in Erie, PA. I'm tired, my arms are full of stuff, my cell phone is ringing and that's when I see Judy. Here's the abbreviated version of the conversation:
Judy - I saw you pull up there with all your stuff you need a donmumble mumble ...
Me - I'm sorry what did you say?
Judy - You need one of those donkey haulers to carry all your stuff.
Me - (incredulous that this statement left someone's mouth) Yeah I guess I do.
Judy - I finally got a guy to come look at your oven today (For those of you unaware it doesn't get above 300 degrees. This makes it virtually worthless. The oven does one thing, heats stuff up. It can no longer perform this task, and even baking a sheet of cookies takes roughly half an hour. A month and a half after complaining she gets someone to fix it.) He took one of those lasers in there and looked at it and it's fixed.
Me - Oh great what was the problem?
Judy - Actually there was no problem. His laser says your oven works fine. It's the thermometer that's broken. They're really inaccurate. You could have it at 500 degrees and it would say it's 300 in there.
Me - Why do my cookies take 30 minutes to bake? Why did it take me almost four and a half hours TO HEAT UP A HAM THE OTHER NIGHT!?
Judy - Oh well I didn't know that. (I told her at least twice) Well it should work now he used one of those lasers.
Me - Well I'll bake something and let you know.
Judy - About that extra fridge in your kitchen we can go ahead and move it in your laundry room and get rid of that useless black shelving unit.
Me - Judy we keep our stuff on that shelf. Plus the fridge is too big to put in the laundry room. It's much deeper and the door won't open then. I won't be able to get in our laundry room. Plus I don't want another fridge in my house that leaks and doesn't work right. We'll move it anywhere you want, but not the laundry room.
Judy - Well I don't know where I'm gonna put it then. We can get rid of the shelf you don't use and put it in there and it'll be out of the way.
Me - exasperated Judy, find a place to put it and we'll move it for you, but it's not going in there. I need to take this phone call.
Yep, you read it right. Our land lady is insane. It's like conversing with a two year old. She doesn't listen to what you say and barrels away with her own ideas. Plus what freaking LASER IS SHE TALKING ABOUT? I'm baffled by this statement. What laser fixes an oven? Why is she using a laser? Do I trust her with a laser? How did this special laser not realize my oven can't cook things? When am I going to get salmonella and die? Why does my kitchen suck so much? What is this laser? I was so furious last night that I just went in my apartment and went to bed at roughly 10:30. It was miserable.
On a lighter note, my trip to Chicago was a blast. I had a ton of fun and U2 put on a great show. This is a blog for another week though. I'll definitely blog about it next week, maybe in a three part blog. The trip there, the show, and the trip home. Stay tuned ... or go do stuff to things with lasers. Blam!
Judy - I saw you pull up there with all your stuff you need a donmumble mumble ...
Me - I'm sorry what did you say?
Judy - You need one of those donkey haulers to carry all your stuff.
Me - (incredulous that this statement left someone's mouth) Yeah I guess I do.
Judy - I finally got a guy to come look at your oven today (For those of you unaware it doesn't get above 300 degrees. This makes it virtually worthless. The oven does one thing, heats stuff up. It can no longer perform this task, and even baking a sheet of cookies takes roughly half an hour. A month and a half after complaining she gets someone to fix it.) He took one of those lasers in there and looked at it and it's fixed.
Me - Oh great what was the problem?
Judy - Actually there was no problem. His laser says your oven works fine. It's the thermometer that's broken. They're really inaccurate. You could have it at 500 degrees and it would say it's 300 in there.
Me - Why do my cookies take 30 minutes to bake? Why did it take me almost four and a half hours TO HEAT UP A HAM THE OTHER NIGHT!?
Judy - Oh well I didn't know that. (I told her at least twice) Well it should work now he used one of those lasers.
Me - Well I'll bake something and let you know.
Judy - About that extra fridge in your kitchen we can go ahead and move it in your laundry room and get rid of that useless black shelving unit.
Me - Judy we keep our stuff on that shelf. Plus the fridge is too big to put in the laundry room. It's much deeper and the door won't open then. I won't be able to get in our laundry room. Plus I don't want another fridge in my house that leaks and doesn't work right. We'll move it anywhere you want, but not the laundry room.
Judy - Well I don't know where I'm gonna put it then. We can get rid of the shelf you don't use and put it in there and it'll be out of the way.
Me - exasperated Judy, find a place to put it and we'll move it for you, but it's not going in there. I need to take this phone call.
Yep, you read it right. Our land lady is insane. It's like conversing with a two year old. She doesn't listen to what you say and barrels away with her own ideas. Plus what freaking LASER IS SHE TALKING ABOUT? I'm baffled by this statement. What laser fixes an oven? Why is she using a laser? Do I trust her with a laser? How did this special laser not realize my oven can't cook things? When am I going to get salmonella and die? Why does my kitchen suck so much? What is this laser? I was so furious last night that I just went in my apartment and went to bed at roughly 10:30. It was miserable.
On a lighter note, my trip to Chicago was a blast. I had a ton of fun and U2 put on a great show. This is a blog for another week though. I'll definitely blog about it next week, maybe in a three part blog. The trip there, the show, and the trip home. Stay tuned ... or go do stuff to things with lasers. Blam!
I have to put this link here
Because George J. Howe and Co. is about 2 blocks down the street from where I work! BOOM!
Tuesday, May 10, 2005
My favorite vices, and their detrimental impact on my health
Ok so I know you all have them. You all have those little naughty things that you love to indulge in when no one's looking (or maybe when everyone's looking you spotlight hogs!). I have a few of them as well-my vices!! In fact, I can actually catagorize my vices into 'favorite vices'. If you haven't yet catagorized and pointed out your favorite vices to yourself or someone else, take some time to do this now! You can even tell them to me because I love when people are as bad as I am! judjudjudjudjud GO!
(listed in ascending order!)
Vice Number 3: Swearing in the Car!!
Ok I know that you all do this. I like to be one who considers himself above the fray of using terse one syllable words to express how I feel. I'm more complex than that, and refuse to believe that profanity is art (though I've heard some people make a colorful case for its artistry). I just think swearing makes you sound base and boorish, not to mention spiritually degrading. So it's with reckless abandon that I fly in the face of my convictions to let you all know that I am a closet potty mouth!
I swear people, if you want to see Smith in rare form, put him behind the wheel of a car on the LIE at rush hour. Or better yet, put him in a car after being behind the wheel of said car for 14 straight days on his endless tour of New York state on a crusade for clean-mouthed college kids (yeah it takes a lot of looking). I think I've even mother effed handicapped retarded children because they decided to walk across the street when I wanted to turn Right on Red. It's bad people. But no matter how bad it gets, swearing in the car always makes me feel (low but...) better!
Vice Number 2: Eating Candy!!!
Ok so this is a relatively harmless vice right? WRONG!! You can ask the enamel of my teeth, or my gums, or my recently filled cavities about how harmless candy eating is. Truth be told, I would eat candy alone for sustinance without too much provication. Candy is really what gets me through every day. At work I probably eat 45 pounds of chocolate, hard candy, and other crap every day. I just actually opened our candy drawer at work and saw that someone has eaten all the candy. I fully realize that I should go out and buy candy, but at the same time, am too paralyzed with grief to get mobile about it. That's the depth of my sickness.
Vice Numero Uno: Abusing Tobacco Producccttssssss
Big surprise here. The only thing that I love doing more than swearing at old ladies with a face full of Dum-Dums is taking a few hours out of my day to smoke pipe, smoke a cigar, or smoke hookah. Tobacco is probably my only legitimate vice that I find myself struggling to say no to. In fact let me tell you a little story about how smoking gave me cancer in my tongue last week (no joke!)!
Take a look at this, people. This is a picture of the human tongue:
Ok this is my tongue. Last week I took my pipe on the road. No big deal right? UNBEKNOWNST TO ME the tongue is actually very sensitive. In fact, I believe it's even possible to burn one's tongue if they are not too careful in smoking their pipe. When you draw in from the bowl of the pipe the warm smoke comes in and bam slaps your tongue around. Generally it makes for a very pleasing taste, and when you're smoking a Boswell's pipe, and tobacco, you know you're smoking the good stuff. Well apparently too much of a good thing is bad for you, because after about 4 solid days of pipe smoking my tongue looked and felt like this*!!!
AHHHHHHH!!! Yeah try having a burnt tongue for the past 5 days and counting. It's not a treat people. I still can't taste anything on the front of my tongue. Go back and look at that picture of the tongue about 2 paragraphs up. If you put some black X's over the sweet and salty parts, the remaining un-X'ed parts would be the only parts that work on my tongue right now. Bitterness and Sour are the two most prevailing tastes in my mouth. Oddly enough, bitter and sour is what fire tastes like as well. And you know what...it serves me right. Now I'll think twice about slow-roasting my tongue over a number of days. Never again will I smoke a pipe or any other tobacco product so long as I live!!
So those are my favorite vices. A less favorite vice is lying and exaggerating about stuff that happens to me. It makes me a great story teller, but not a good attention to detail person.
*"And the tongue [is] a fire, a world of iniquity: so is the tongue among our members, that it defileth the whole body, and setteth on fire the course of nature; and it is set on fire of hell" (James 3:6, NIV) I've got hellfire in my mouf!!!
(listed in ascending order!)
Vice Number 3: Swearing in the Car!!
Ok I know that you all do this. I like to be one who considers himself above the fray of using terse one syllable words to express how I feel. I'm more complex than that, and refuse to believe that profanity is art (though I've heard some people make a colorful case for its artistry). I just think swearing makes you sound base and boorish, not to mention spiritually degrading. So it's with reckless abandon that I fly in the face of my convictions to let you all know that I am a closet potty mouth!
I swear people, if you want to see Smith in rare form, put him behind the wheel of a car on the LIE at rush hour. Or better yet, put him in a car after being behind the wheel of said car for 14 straight days on his endless tour of New York state on a crusade for clean-mouthed college kids (yeah it takes a lot of looking). I think I've even mother effed handicapped retarded children because they decided to walk across the street when I wanted to turn Right on Red. It's bad people. But no matter how bad it gets, swearing in the car always makes me feel (low but...) better!
Vice Number 2: Eating Candy!!!
Ok so this is a relatively harmless vice right? WRONG!! You can ask the enamel of my teeth, or my gums, or my recently filled cavities about how harmless candy eating is. Truth be told, I would eat candy alone for sustinance without too much provication. Candy is really what gets me through every day. At work I probably eat 45 pounds of chocolate, hard candy, and other crap every day. I just actually opened our candy drawer at work and saw that someone has eaten all the candy. I fully realize that I should go out and buy candy, but at the same time, am too paralyzed with grief to get mobile about it. That's the depth of my sickness.
Vice Numero Uno: Abusing Tobacco Producccttssssss
Big surprise here. The only thing that I love doing more than swearing at old ladies with a face full of Dum-Dums is taking a few hours out of my day to smoke pipe, smoke a cigar, or smoke hookah. Tobacco is probably my only legitimate vice that I find myself struggling to say no to. In fact let me tell you a little story about how smoking gave me cancer in my tongue last week (no joke!)!
Take a look at this, people. This is a picture of the human tongue:
Ok this is my tongue. Last week I took my pipe on the road. No big deal right? UNBEKNOWNST TO ME the tongue is actually very sensitive. In fact, I believe it's even possible to burn one's tongue if they are not too careful in smoking their pipe. When you draw in from the bowl of the pipe the warm smoke comes in and bam slaps your tongue around. Generally it makes for a very pleasing taste, and when you're smoking a Boswell's pipe, and tobacco, you know you're smoking the good stuff. Well apparently too much of a good thing is bad for you, because after about 4 solid days of pipe smoking my tongue looked and felt like this*!!!
AHHHHHHH!!! Yeah try having a burnt tongue for the past 5 days and counting. It's not a treat people. I still can't taste anything on the front of my tongue. Go back and look at that picture of the tongue about 2 paragraphs up. If you put some black X's over the sweet and salty parts, the remaining un-X'ed parts would be the only parts that work on my tongue right now. Bitterness and Sour are the two most prevailing tastes in my mouth. Oddly enough, bitter and sour is what fire tastes like as well. And you know what...it serves me right. Now I'll think twice about slow-roasting my tongue over a number of days. Never again will I smoke a pipe or any other tobacco product so long as I live!!
So those are my favorite vices. A less favorite vice is lying and exaggerating about stuff that happens to me. It makes me a great story teller, but not a good attention to detail person.
*"And the tongue [is] a fire, a world of iniquity: so is the tongue among our members, that it defileth the whole body, and setteth on fire the course of nature; and it is set on fire of hell" (James 3:6, NIV) I've got hellfire in my mouf!!!
Sunday, May 08, 2005
BACK IN YA FACE!!!!!
BAM!!!!!!
Ok I'm not going to lie. I just wrote a big long blog about a subject very important to me...hating on semi truck drivers. I included personal experiences, and even a poem about how much I hate semi truck drivers. But after reading it through (just to suit my own pedantic need to watch myself talk) I just couldn't post it! It just wasn't right! So here's the long and short of what I was going to say!
1) I hate semi truck drivers
2) (this is in order to prevent some wise remark from Lillet or Tray) Ok how about this. Dissociating the person from the job, I hate stupid semi truck drivers...guys who try to pass other semi trucks up a long, winding hill and cause a stupid polish roadblock; semi truck drivers who swerve into your lane and make you either slam on your breaks or die; Semi truck drivers who in the construction zone drive 20 under the suggested contruction speed because they're oh so great samaritains; Semi truck drivers who drive slowly and hold up traffic in general; Semi truck drivers who STILL can't make those wide turns and make you back up into someone else just to get out of their way. THOSE of the semi truck drivers I despise
3) I smoked my new pipe this past week and legitimately burnt my tongue. I haven't been able to taste anything for going on 4 days. OUCH!!
So that's what I wanted to say people. To those of you GCC kids getting ready to graduate, good work. Hang out in there and crush those last few finals. To everyone else who just graduated, way to be. Now go out there and change the world, dang it!
Ok I'm not going to lie. I just wrote a big long blog about a subject very important to me...hating on semi truck drivers. I included personal experiences, and even a poem about how much I hate semi truck drivers. But after reading it through (just to suit my own pedantic need to watch myself talk) I just couldn't post it! It just wasn't right! So here's the long and short of what I was going to say!
1) I hate semi truck drivers
2) (this is in order to prevent some wise remark from Lillet or Tray) Ok how about this. Dissociating the person from the job, I hate stupid semi truck drivers...guys who try to pass other semi trucks up a long, winding hill and cause a stupid polish roadblock; semi truck drivers who swerve into your lane and make you either slam on your breaks or die; Semi truck drivers who in the construction zone drive 20 under the suggested contruction speed because they're oh so great samaritains; Semi truck drivers who drive slowly and hold up traffic in general; Semi truck drivers who STILL can't make those wide turns and make you back up into someone else just to get out of their way. THOSE of the semi truck drivers I despise
3) I smoked my new pipe this past week and legitimately burnt my tongue. I haven't been able to taste anything for going on 4 days. OUCH!!
So that's what I wanted to say people. To those of you GCC kids getting ready to graduate, good work. Hang out in there and crush those last few finals. To everyone else who just graduated, way to be. Now go out there and change the world, dang it!
Friday, May 06, 2005
Black sucking vortexes
You know when you meet someone who's really boring? Someone's who is dry and when you're around them you just don't have the energy to put forth?
Then there's a level of person that exceeds that. There's the person that is such a black vortex that it not only taxes you when you're with them, but sucks the life from you for the rest of the day. I ran into one of those today. Someone who hit me so hard with their blowy personality that I have nothing left to give all day.
So there goes my post in my blog. I was going to be funny and post sweet stuff that's underrated an the like. But you lose because of Mr. Blowy this afternoon.
I will say this though. In 27 hours I will be seeing U2 in concert. After all there's only one more sleep till U2 ...
Then there's a level of person that exceeds that. There's the person that is such a black vortex that it not only taxes you when you're with them, but sucks the life from you for the rest of the day. I ran into one of those today. Someone who hit me so hard with their blowy personality that I have nothing left to give all day.
So there goes my post in my blog. I was going to be funny and post sweet stuff that's underrated an the like. But you lose because of Mr. Blowy this afternoon.
I will say this though. In 27 hours I will be seeing U2 in concert. After all there's only one more sleep till U2 ...
Thursday, May 05, 2005
Amazing isn't it?
This is going to be the link addition of my blog. I don't do this often, but there are three different articles that deserve reading. Read the article and then read my brief yet hopefully meaningful insight.
1.) Glenn Beck's Website
That link sends you to an amazing story on the Glenn Beck website. I'm not going to go off about it. But in summary it's about a man named Donald Herbert. He was a fire fighter and has been in a coma for roughly the last ten years. He recently awoke from his coma and the first words he said were, "I want to talk to my wife."
My blog has in no way been a memorial or a tribute to Terri Schiavo. But this case is stunningly similar, yet the media refuses to note this. Yeah, she probably wouldn't have awakened from her coma at all. I hope the court system in America feels good about her blood on their hands.
2.) Josh's Blog
This is a buddy of mine's blog. His name is Josh, and he just wrote a brief piece about Jennifer Wilbanks. Maybe you don't recognize the name so let me help you ... she's the bride that lied to America and ran off from her wedding. Now you recognize her. The part I'm miffed about is the part about Fernando Mateo, the President of Hispanics Across America. The fact that he's demanding an apology from this girl is absurd. You can read the post and my comment for further thoughts. Good find Josh.
3.) Lillet and Trey
This is a piece from the blog of Lillet and Trey. We've referenced them a couple of times in our blog. They're the raging liberals that hate America. Great writers, but cracked out kids. I dare say they should be deported for their anti-American ways. They claim America hates them ... I think they hate America. This is the part that got me up in arms. Lillet is discussing America's concern of homosexual behavior or even sexual behavior.
"Open Letter to America: If you are someone who thinks that what two guys or girls do with each other is a bigger concern than
a) A lying, impeachable President
b) Poverty
c) Global Warming
d) Corporate Criminality
e) Wal-Mart
f) Rampant Outsourcing and Job Loss
g) Rudeness"
Here are my quick hit bullet points
a) We tried to deal with Bill Clinton. So I think America was concerned with that. You're probably talking about Bush, but remember Clinton? Probably not Democrats still LOVE him.
b) Poverty - a.k.a. people abusing the welfare system. I'd love to get rid of that and actually help poor people get jobs. Welfare costs taxpayers roughly $35,000 a year I think. My buddy cited this stat once, I just can't remember where. I'd love to do something about Welfare, but democrats won't allow it. What a waste.
c) Global warming - is a huge myth and even my 13 year old brother knows that. Scientists take horribly inaccurate measurements that aren't high enough in the atmosphere, and when they do, it's too inaccurate to prove anything. If Global warming is so bad, why the crap was it snowing last weekend?
d) Corporate Criminality - We do try to do something about this. But it's some isolated incidences. Nothing as massive and relative to the morality of an entire nation as homosexuality.
e) Wal-Mart - I agree it does blow and mistreat a fair amount of employees. It drives out businesses and then jacks up the prices. Clearly not important enough to raise the ire of the nation.
f) Rampant outsourcing - We try to deal with this often. Huge issues in the senate like Barbara Boxer trying to buy low prescription drugs from Canada instead of buying them from American works and businesses. That's outsourcing right? Oh yeah she says Republicans doing it all the time. Most democrats in the media don't make it an issue. But we're trying to fight it.
g) Rudeness - You're stupid for putting that. Haha, just a bad joke. Speaking of rudeness how about Lillet and Trey not getting back to Andrew when he was out in Brooklyn and wanted to visit them. Way to ignore his comments and attempts to catch a quick meal with you guys. Talk about rudeness ...
These are things that I get fired up about on a daily basis and things a lot of America would love to change. We also just think that it's slightly immoral for homosexuality to be legal. Not to mention detrimental to children who are parented in such homes. It's just not as solid as the traditional nuclear home. This will probably spark a debate, but one we've put off for a while, so let the battle begin. Alright, that's all I've got for now. Enjoy those few links and I've got some lame humorous stuff coming your way tomorrow.
1.) Glenn Beck's Website
That link sends you to an amazing story on the Glenn Beck website. I'm not going to go off about it. But in summary it's about a man named Donald Herbert. He was a fire fighter and has been in a coma for roughly the last ten years. He recently awoke from his coma and the first words he said were, "I want to talk to my wife."
My blog has in no way been a memorial or a tribute to Terri Schiavo. But this case is stunningly similar, yet the media refuses to note this. Yeah, she probably wouldn't have awakened from her coma at all. I hope the court system in America feels good about her blood on their hands.
2.) Josh's Blog
This is a buddy of mine's blog. His name is Josh, and he just wrote a brief piece about Jennifer Wilbanks. Maybe you don't recognize the name so let me help you ... she's the bride that lied to America and ran off from her wedding. Now you recognize her. The part I'm miffed about is the part about Fernando Mateo, the President of Hispanics Across America. The fact that he's demanding an apology from this girl is absurd. You can read the post and my comment for further thoughts. Good find Josh.
3.) Lillet and Trey
This is a piece from the blog of Lillet and Trey. We've referenced them a couple of times in our blog. They're the raging liberals that hate America. Great writers, but cracked out kids. I dare say they should be deported for their anti-American ways. They claim America hates them ... I think they hate America. This is the part that got me up in arms. Lillet is discussing America's concern of homosexual behavior or even sexual behavior.
"Open Letter to America: If you are someone who thinks that what two guys or girls do with each other is a bigger concern than
a) A lying, impeachable President
b) Poverty
c) Global Warming
d) Corporate Criminality
e) Wal-Mart
f) Rampant Outsourcing and Job Loss
g) Rudeness"
Here are my quick hit bullet points
a) We tried to deal with Bill Clinton. So I think America was concerned with that. You're probably talking about Bush, but remember Clinton? Probably not Democrats still LOVE him.
b) Poverty - a.k.a. people abusing the welfare system. I'd love to get rid of that and actually help poor people get jobs. Welfare costs taxpayers roughly $35,000 a year I think. My buddy cited this stat once, I just can't remember where. I'd love to do something about Welfare, but democrats won't allow it. What a waste.
c) Global warming - is a huge myth and even my 13 year old brother knows that. Scientists take horribly inaccurate measurements that aren't high enough in the atmosphere, and when they do, it's too inaccurate to prove anything. If Global warming is so bad, why the crap was it snowing last weekend?
d) Corporate Criminality - We do try to do something about this. But it's some isolated incidences. Nothing as massive and relative to the morality of an entire nation as homosexuality.
e) Wal-Mart - I agree it does blow and mistreat a fair amount of employees. It drives out businesses and then jacks up the prices. Clearly not important enough to raise the ire of the nation.
f) Rampant outsourcing - We try to deal with this often. Huge issues in the senate like Barbara Boxer trying to buy low prescription drugs from Canada instead of buying them from American works and businesses. That's outsourcing right? Oh yeah she says Republicans doing it all the time. Most democrats in the media don't make it an issue. But we're trying to fight it.
g) Rudeness - You're stupid for putting that. Haha, just a bad joke. Speaking of rudeness how about Lillet and Trey not getting back to Andrew when he was out in Brooklyn and wanted to visit them. Way to ignore his comments and attempts to catch a quick meal with you guys. Talk about rudeness ...
These are things that I get fired up about on a daily basis and things a lot of America would love to change. We also just think that it's slightly immoral for homosexuality to be legal. Not to mention detrimental to children who are parented in such homes. It's just not as solid as the traditional nuclear home. This will probably spark a debate, but one we've put off for a while, so let the battle begin. Alright, that's all I've got for now. Enjoy those few links and I've got some lame humorous stuff coming your way tomorrow.
Monday, May 02, 2005
Passionate defense
So I wasn't planning on posting today. I was too busy to think this weekend and therefore nothing can cometh forth. Ok, that's not quite true. I chose not to think, but instead to nap and watch tons of the NBA playoffs instead. You know, one of those classic lazy as all else weekends. Filled with two big meals, lots of NBA, a baseball game, and church to boot. Back to the matter at hand though. I was reading a story on Fox News this morning and felt it warranted definite posting. The story is key Australia Stands Tall
Since most of you won't read the story, or will click on it and not take the time to read all of it once you go there, I'll do the brief summary thing. An Australian Engineer working in Iraq was kidnapped. This is exactly the type of news that we have become desensitized too since it happens so often, much like random car bombings in either Iraq or Israel. But this man has been over there for a year and a half and has a wife in California. He resides in CA a lot, but works all over the world, and is Australian. Of course the terrorist animals that kidnapped him released one of those horrible tapes of him scared at gun point begging for help. If video footage like that doesn't enrage you - you must be dead.
Random subpoint the sooner we rid the world of pigs like this the better off we are. Forget the fact that the rulers of this nation used to put people in plastic shredders. You were lucky if you went in head first, because you died instantly, unlike if you want feet first. We now have sick sadistic terrorists capturing innocent hard working men and women and holding them hostage. Not only this, but then they release the tape as a sick and malicious slap in the face to his wife and family. It's horrifying to see and equally as horrifying to think they inhabit this planet with us.
So of course the terrorists ask for the troops to leave Iraq and the man will not be harmed. The absurdity of this statement is baffling. Like we're supposed to believe people who think it's ok to kidnap, threaten, and humiliate others. If the troops actually pull out, they'll let him go unharmed. I'm sure that will happen. And you know what? These people that act in such hateful ways, they'll go on living peacefully and never doing wrong again. It's utterly proposterous to take these men at their word. And it makes me angry that they even keep trying.
So today I salute three people or groups. First and foremost - I salute every person over seas anywhere serving their country and freedom. I salute those from Britain, Australia, Poland, America - the list could go on. The article states that Australia only has 1,370 over there, but it's a big contribution none the less, and when they lose a person it hurts just as much as when America does. So thank you all for your service not only to this nation, but the idea of freedom around the world. You have given of your time and risked your life for these ideals and we owe you a debt of gratitude.
I salute the nation currently of Australia. It's a hard line to take in this instance, but Australia has. They have created a task force in an effort to save this man, but have also asserted that they will under no circumstance remove their troops from Iraq or pay any ransom. It may seem heartless and it may seem cruel. I maintain they would not release the hostage any way. But Australia, as well as other nations who have in the past, is making a claim for freedom and justice. They're letting the light shine in the darkness. We will reach the end, and we will in the future have a free nation, and an ally in Iraq. Australia we thank you for your help and the strong message you send to the world.
My last salute is simple, but goes to the people of Iraq whom we never hear of thanks to the media or websites like Yahoo. We never hear of the Iraqis who are happy we're there, who are trying to elect the new government, or those who have signed up for their army and are being trained. Yahoo always shows pictures of those soldiers with Iraqis behind them crying or clutching a teddy bear in sadness. Yet I've talked to men and women who have served and can say there are people over there, the majority even, who are happy, safe, and free. That sentence had to be punctuated incorrectly. Anyway, so here is a salute to those Iraqis are fighting and free. We look forward to a future of security for you.
Here comes the horribly awkward ending transition, but I need to blog this. Only 5 days until I see U2 in concert in Chicago! Oh yeah, you may get a countdown each day this week. Later crackers.
Since most of you won't read the story, or will click on it and not take the time to read all of it once you go there, I'll do the brief summary thing. An Australian Engineer working in Iraq was kidnapped. This is exactly the type of news that we have become desensitized too since it happens so often, much like random car bombings in either Iraq or Israel. But this man has been over there for a year and a half and has a wife in California. He resides in CA a lot, but works all over the world, and is Australian. Of course the terrorist animals that kidnapped him released one of those horrible tapes of him scared at gun point begging for help. If video footage like that doesn't enrage you - you must be dead.
Random subpoint the sooner we rid the world of pigs like this the better off we are. Forget the fact that the rulers of this nation used to put people in plastic shredders. You were lucky if you went in head first, because you died instantly, unlike if you want feet first. We now have sick sadistic terrorists capturing innocent hard working men and women and holding them hostage. Not only this, but then they release the tape as a sick and malicious slap in the face to his wife and family. It's horrifying to see and equally as horrifying to think they inhabit this planet with us.
So of course the terrorists ask for the troops to leave Iraq and the man will not be harmed. The absurdity of this statement is baffling. Like we're supposed to believe people who think it's ok to kidnap, threaten, and humiliate others. If the troops actually pull out, they'll let him go unharmed. I'm sure that will happen. And you know what? These people that act in such hateful ways, they'll go on living peacefully and never doing wrong again. It's utterly proposterous to take these men at their word. And it makes me angry that they even keep trying.
So today I salute three people or groups. First and foremost - I salute every person over seas anywhere serving their country and freedom. I salute those from Britain, Australia, Poland, America - the list could go on. The article states that Australia only has 1,370 over there, but it's a big contribution none the less, and when they lose a person it hurts just as much as when America does. So thank you all for your service not only to this nation, but the idea of freedom around the world. You have given of your time and risked your life for these ideals and we owe you a debt of gratitude.
I salute the nation currently of Australia. It's a hard line to take in this instance, but Australia has. They have created a task force in an effort to save this man, but have also asserted that they will under no circumstance remove their troops from Iraq or pay any ransom. It may seem heartless and it may seem cruel. I maintain they would not release the hostage any way. But Australia, as well as other nations who have in the past, is making a claim for freedom and justice. They're letting the light shine in the darkness. We will reach the end, and we will in the future have a free nation, and an ally in Iraq. Australia we thank you for your help and the strong message you send to the world.
My last salute is simple, but goes to the people of Iraq whom we never hear of thanks to the media or websites like Yahoo. We never hear of the Iraqis who are happy we're there, who are trying to elect the new government, or those who have signed up for their army and are being trained. Yahoo always shows pictures of those soldiers with Iraqis behind them crying or clutching a teddy bear in sadness. Yet I've talked to men and women who have served and can say there are people over there, the majority even, who are happy, safe, and free. That sentence had to be punctuated incorrectly. Anyway, so here is a salute to those Iraqis are fighting and free. We look forward to a future of security for you.
Here comes the horribly awkward ending transition, but I need to blog this. Only 5 days until I see U2 in concert in Chicago! Oh yeah, you may get a countdown each day this week. Later crackers.
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