Tuesday, April 18, 2006

TV Be Gone!

It is finished. No, not the final words of Jesus, but yes you are correct. I'm referring to our life with cable. As the clock switched over from 11:59:59 to 12:00:00 on the evening of April the 14th, our cable was shut off. We are now 100% cable free and actually internet free. Not by design, but I know I promised a third blog about life after cable and what you can do with your time. So here it is, although admittedly lame. So it will also be a recap blog, but short. Andrew wants to come back and talk to y'inz.

1.) You watch a ton of TV.

2.) TV makes you have a shorter attention span.

3.) Get rid of it.

That's all I have to say really. Look me in the eye and tell me that you couldn't use 28 more hours week to do other stuff. Now I know that was the statistic for children 8-21. So adapt it a bit. You get home at 5:30 from work, cook dinner and sit down at 6 to eat it. You watch an hour of Seinfeld, then maybe two other shows after it, so you're now at two hours of TV a night. Let's say you watch Lost for an hour and some other random thirty minute show. That's three and a half hours of TV a night, times 7 ... and yep you got it ... 24 and a half hours of TV a week. Heck, I'll dock it to 21 for you.

Tell me you couldn't use 21 more hours a week. When we're all soooooooo busy. Who isn't busy anymore? Get over yourself and do something about it. You could gain almost a whole other day. What can you do in this time?

1.) Read more ... obviously.

2.) Learn to play an instrument.

3.) Learn to paint or pick up a hobby (say origami or sign language)

4.) Learn a foreign language, and then learn to speak it in a really sexy way (ladies love that).

5.) Hang out with people. Life is not like Flavor of Love. Real people are not like Flava Flav.

6.) Get outside and kill an animal ... woops ... that's a bad idea.

Those are just a few suggestions. If you don't want to be as radical as we are and get rid of cable, get someone to keep you accountable to an hour of television a night. NO MORE! When you're done with that hour, throw a bed sheet over it. You're less likely to get up off the couch and take the sheet off, then you are to turn the TV on when you're bored. Just cover it up.

That's really the only point of my blog. Except to ask you to send suggestions our way as well. What should we do now that we don't have cable. Your input is greatly appreciated. And many thanks to faithful reader Trey for commenting and reading. I think that was a shout out. I'm so lame. Catch y'inz later.

3 comments:

Trey said...

I don't think it's a shout-out if you phrase it "many thanks..."

But you're still lame, proving the point that cable teaches you how to be cool.

Now I'm gonna go watch Hoopz lay the smack down on New York in the Flavor of Love reunion episode.

Donkey Patrol said...

Trey,

That's a great episode!! My favorite episode was when New York's mom came to visit and caller her a fat ho! Oh ha ha haaa and then there was that one episode were Flav is clearly getting high, but VH1 blurs out his blunt sitting in the ashtray on his bed. So many memories from Flavor of Love!

Joel Settecase said...

You could build a life-size cabin out of Lincoln Logs.